Will I ever be able to stop thinking about her affair?

It's been well over a year now and I just cannot stop thinking about my wife's affair. I am trying like hell to work this out and we get along OK for the most part, but it's only because I spend 100% of my time trying to distract myself. Yes, I read, I write, I play music, I watch crap on YouTube and failblog etc... and all that works to get me thinking about something else for a little while, but as soon as my mind isn't completely involved in something else, I go right back to thinking about what she did. I can't even really listen to music in the car on my way back and forth to work anymore because that doesn't get me distracted enough. I've had to start listening to audiobooks to get that involved. It's the very first thing I think of every single day when I wake up. I spend showers trying to calm myself down before tackling my day. I don't know how much longer I can take this. I'm taking anti-depressants which seemed to help at first, but seem almost like nothing now. I'm starting individual counseling this week and I'm afraid that might even make it worse because I'll be talking about it. We've been in couples counseling on and off since this happened and I don't really think it's helped much.